She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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