I hate all girls vehemently.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
