why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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