But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
