Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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