Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
