I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Say something about gay babies.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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