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this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
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