We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
