And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
