ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
