so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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