We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Let's paint friendship bongs
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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