it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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