you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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