Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.

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  (610): I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/nwna
  Replies (14) Good night (668) Bad night (1254)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.

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  (907): I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it. http://tfl.nu/6xls
  Replies (38) Good night (8686) Bad night (1417)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.

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  (816): Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth. http://tfl.nu/la0a
  Replies (9) Good night (2915) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.

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  (304): Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way. http://tfl.nu/jfrt
  Replies (36) Good night (7366) Bad night (1289)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights

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  (812): woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights http://tfl.nu/5oxk
  Replies (16) Good night (1116) Bad night (2751)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.

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  (+61): THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE. http://tfl.nu/omc3
  Replies (12) Good night (3537) Bad night (809)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.

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  (330): He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses. http://tfl.nu/vaq0
  Replies (16) Good night (4175) Bad night (1190)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.

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  (785): I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail. http://tfl.nu/ahrd
  Replies (5) Good night (807) Bad night (1905)
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  (438): View more from Quebec

  Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?

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  (438): Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room? http://tfl.nu/i0aj
  Replies (15) Good night (658) Bad night (1144)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...

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  (+44): The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off... http://tfl.nu/dj4h
  Replies (2) Good night (1306) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it

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  (802): I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it http://tfl.nu/32uz
  Replies (4) Good night (1150) Bad night (580)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.

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  (207): I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table. http://tfl.nu/sbpv
  Replies (5) Good night (594) Bad night (1113)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.

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  (410): It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again. http://tfl.nu/2qb3
  Replies (4) Good night (263) Bad night (974)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.

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  (914): I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer. (216): Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro. http://tfl.nu/w82v
  Replies (2) Good night (639) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.

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  (781): oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games. http://tfl.nu/o181
  Replies (0) Good night (449) Bad night (362)

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