I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
The convent might be a nice break from real life