even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.