"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
