I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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