Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
