I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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