Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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