It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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