try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
