So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
