I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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