he puts the penis in happiness.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Maybe he injected his testicle?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
