Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I skipped work to stalk him.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
