Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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