I think I died a long time ago.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
