No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
