"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
