ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
