I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
