can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
