i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
handjob tips. give me some.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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