Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
