bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
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I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
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Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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