help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
no, he came in my armpit
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
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It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
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This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.