Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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