all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize