you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.