let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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