im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
