Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
you never un-have a 4some
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
