Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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