How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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