he shaved USA in his pubs
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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