i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
