if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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